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Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 24 Jun 2015, 22:38
by J the J
Boxorino wrote:i don't think we have to put these kinds of labels on ourselves. also colour doesn't define gender thanks.


I totally agree Boxy.

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 25 Jun 2015, 01:01
by Vienna
Boxorino wrote:i don't think we have to put these kinds of labels on ourselves. also colour doesn't define gender thanks.


I see what you're getting at, and am in complete agreement.

However, I read the question to encompass something closer to self-experession and general personal preference-- not nessesarily asking us to label ourselves. Whatever your style, I think it's important that we learn to embrace what defines us. Too often the judgement of others causes us to become unfaithful to our own person. Love yourself, and not the thought of others loving the idea of you.

I would also like to apologize for my crude languange before, because I didn't know that word wasn't permitted. With that out there, I still stand by what I said. Sorry Ex! I wasn't about to let that one go ;P

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 25 Jun 2015, 18:12
by Excalibur
Vienna wrote:
Excalibur wrote:
Angel wrote:
Excalibur wrote:Don't be a girly girl.

Now you must explain yourself.



idk girly girls are kinda annoying.


There is tom boy, normal girl, and girly girl....


Damn you. <3

Girls shouldn't have to change who they are just because you have a problem with it. Ladies; be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. :D


Woah, lol I didn't ask anyone to change. Be who you want to be.. be true to yourself. I was just joking. I guess, what im coming from is that my sisters are girly girls and can sometimes be annoying. Doesn't mean I don't love them. :) But yeah, I dont want anyone changing themselves for others.

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 25 Jun 2015, 23:53
by Vienna
Excalibur wrote:
Vienna wrote:
Excalibur wrote:
Angel wrote:
Excalibur wrote:Don't be a girly girl.

Now you must explain yourself.



idk girly girls are kinda annoying.


There is tom boy, normal girl, and girly girl....


Damn you. <3

Girls shouldn't have to change who they are just because you have a problem with it. Ladies; be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. :D


Woah, lol I didn't ask anyone to change. Be who you want to be.. be true to yourself. I was just joking. I guess, what im coming from is that my sisters are girly girls and can sometimes be annoying. Doesn't mean I don't love them. :) But yeah, I dont want anyone changing themselves for others.


If a friend of mine were to absent-mindedly mention that a characteristic of mine was "annoying" and "don't be" that person, I know I would be disheartened. I also wonder how many young girls might have read that response shamefaced. Especially as a person with credibility and power in the FWG community, your response was poorly chosen. To then blow it off as nothing? Not so great, either.

Weak excuses aside, it is awesome you recognize and support the individual. We can agree on something :roll:

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 26 Jun 2015, 03:51
by Excalibur
Vienna wrote:If a friend of mine were to absent-mindedly mention that a characteristic of mine was "annoying" and "don't be" that person, I know I would be disheartened. I also wonder how many young girls might have read that response shamefaced. Especially as a person with credibility and power in the FWG community, your response was poorly chosen. To then blow it off as nothing? Not so great, either.

Weak excuses aside, it is awesome you recognize and support the individual. We can agree on something :roll:


I feel somewhere along the line, something went wrong and you misunderstood what I was trying to express or convey through my posts, and I do apologize for the confusion. It could be that I didn't express my intentions clearly, or that being new to the community you are unfamiliar with my playful/joking nature. My original post was posted more than a year ago on Apr 22, 2014 and contained the text "Dont be a girly girl." I believe I posted it in response to
FWG Leader wrote:tomboys are more fun that girly girls.
and
Angel wrote:I can go from tomboy to girly easily.
Being able to balance the two is the key.

It was in no way meant to be taken seriously, like half the other opinion posts on this topic. I also feel there was some context that I cannot recall regarding that post since it was such a long time ago, probably an inside joke.

But if we are getting a little serious, I do stand by what I said about girly girls being annoying in my opinion. Coming from an extremely conservative Texan family, most of the girly girls I have met in my area have been stuck up and superficial, and those are characteristics I find annoying. Im not saying that all girly girls annoying just the ones I have met based on past experience.

If you look at this thread as a whole, it is full of remarks and opinions regarding Tom Boys and Girly Girls. Some posters talk about which type of girl is more "attractive" or "fun", while others talk about which type of girl they prefer. Some people are even unsure as to which type of girl they are. All of these posts can "dishearten" any reader who is unsure and unconfident in his our her own views. At the end of the day these are just opinions, and I think everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Not everyone has to agree with the opinions of others or even like other people, but I do feel that everyone should show respect towards others and their opinions.

To be "disheartened" by the views/opinions of others is wrong. The views of others should not have any impact on a person's confidence and self approval. Like you said in your previous post "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." If a person is putting you down, are they really your friend in the first place? People make friends based on mutual interests and opinions; if two people don't share opinions/belief systems they will most likely not be friends.

I guess what im trying to say is, don't base your self worth or self image on the opinions of others. It's your life, live it how you want to.

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 27 Jun 2015, 02:27
by The Dice Man
Vienna wrote:
Excalibur wrote:
Angel wrote:
Excalibur wrote:Don't be a girly girl.

Now you must explain yourself.



idk girly girls are kinda annoying.


There is tom boy, normal girl, and girly girl....


Damn you. <3

Girls shouldn't have to change who they are just because you have a problem with it. Ladies; be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. :D

Girls should change how they are just because ex likes it that way.

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 29 Jun 2015, 05:41
by Vienna
Right. I can see where you're coming from. My second response to you came from a place of hurt, since I didn't think you were being sincere and were just throwing words together non-chalantly, and at the time I felt like that needed to be addressed. Regardless of whether there was sincerity or not (and all has been put out on the table now), I shouldn't be hoity-toity enough to think it's my place to go "educating" people. This is my first time on a forum or chat ect, so please bare with me as I learn my way around the digital world: Think first, write after :oops:

I'm sorry, Excalibur. I went too far. And, I shouldn't have made assumptions. I bet it didn't feel so hot to have some crazed woman hounding you. Yikes...

I am not usually so irritable. Recently, I did quit one of my jobs due to the unrelenting sexism and recurring sexual harassment. This doesn't justify me being a hard-ass (can I say that?). I'm just insecure enough that I want you to know I am not always such a stiff, and this was my little way of licking some wounds.

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 30 Jun 2015, 03:22
by J the J
The issue within this post was not anything to do with what Ex said (he was just mucking around, as he always does. No need to get so defensive, although I can understand it), it was the original posts. Gender is not defined by colours or characteristics, it is not defined by whether someone has a p***s or a v****a/v***a. Someones gender is a part of someones unique identity, their sexual orientation or gender can vary greatly from anothers feelings towards these things.

Being a tomboy and being genderqueer/fluid is very different, and I of course don't expect everyone to understand that, because it is quite a new thing to most people and it does require reading to totally understand. Being a tomboy relates to their mannerisms, how they dress, etc. "Gender fluidity extends beyond behavior and interests, and actually serves to specifically define their gender identity. In other words, a person may feel they are more female on some days and more male on others, or possibly feel that neither term describes them accurately." [www.genderdiversity.org].

Please feel free to read any of the links following :) :

https://www.genderspectrum.org/quick-li ... ng-gender/

http://www.genderdiversity.org/resources/terminology/

Re: Girly girl or Tomboy?

Posted: 30 Jun 2015, 04:19
by Excalibur
Vienna wrote:Right. I can see where you're coming from. My second response to you came from a place of hurt, since I didn't think you were being sincere and were just throwing words together non-chalantly, and at the time I felt like that needed to be addressed. Regardless of whether there was sincerity or not (and all has been put out on the table now), I shouldn't be hoity-toity enough to think it's my place to go "educating" people. This is my first time on a forum or chat ect, so please bare with me as I learn my way around the digital world: Think first, write after :oops:

I'm sorry, Excalibur. I went too far. And, I shouldn't have made assumptions. I bet it didn't feel so hot to have some crazed woman hounding you. Yikes...

I am not usually so irritable. Recently, I did quit one of my jobs due to the unrelenting sexism and recurring sexual harassment. This doesn't justify me being a hard-ass (can I say that?). I'm just insecure enough that I want you to know I am not always such a stiff, and this was my little way of licking some wounds.



No Worries :) Welcome to FWG :P Ur like the new new person now. Congrats.
J was the last new new person... dont tell her i said that.
Also let's get this thread back on TOPICCCCC


If I was a girl, I would Totes be a Tom Boy.