Alice wrote:Flobalob wrote:Alice wrote:<Snip>
First of all, still doesn't change the fact that Jared is 5'9". You cannot redeem that.
Disclaimer: I accept no responsibility for any offence caused. She started it.
Secondly..
"I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her."
What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets?
Women.
Everyone says the world would be better off if it was run by women. Sure, maybe there wouldn't be violence and territorial conquests fueled by male testosterone. But instead, we'd have a bunch of jealous countries that aren't talking to each other.
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".
Why did the woman cross the road?
I don't know, but what is she doing out of the kitchen?
How are women and tornadoes alike?
They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
You're just jealous.
Certainly not of his height.