I have here a prepared speech on why you should vote for him, please keep all questions until the end. We shall start by covering all major bases in a presidency campaign. These topic will include some highly controversial topics but we shall try to tread carefully.
The first topic is as follows,
Campaign Finance:
President Garfield will finance his campaign fairly, with those who do the work being able to get benefits, and being paid a fair living allowance, it is as follows.
He shall finance one vet visit a year, and one small animal hospital visit.
Everyone shall receive enough catnip to enjoy approx. 4 teaspoons a day, This is generous, but he believes we all should be able to live comfortable. Dental treats shall also be covered to ensure good hygiene. He also will allot one can of wet food a day, and two cups of dry food for each adult, with two cans for children.
Climate change:
Garfield believes everyone should be entitled to carry one travel fan per person for the summer months.
Debt:
President Garfield has exactly $3 in his cat treat fund and owes no one.
Defense:
Garfield can catch a mouse faster than you can say "Eeek! a mouse!" He is also proficient in catching flies, lizards, and spiders.
Education:
Everyone should learn to hunt Mice and President Garfield will ensure everyone gets the opportunity. It isn't just a privilege if he gets his way.
Health Care:
President Garfield believes everyone should be able to get neutered or spayed for a decent price, and all should be able to afford a decent vet if the need should come up. Free rabies vaccines for all!
Income Equality:
President Garfield acknowledges that dogs are the lower class, but he wants to know if that is really what we should be worrying about?
Taxes:
He will charge everyone some money, but not too much.
Thank you for enjoying Garfield's candidate speech, he will now take any questions.
#BestShooter 
~ Coolest 
