My life

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J3rdegree
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My life

Postby J3rdegree » 23 Jun 2016, 18:07

So, as many of you have noticed I have been on a lot less recently.. by that meaning almost never. This topic is basically to clarify what was going through my life the past year or two so that has ripped me away from the site and sanity in general.

Not going to bother proofreading this after and I'm not in the best of minds right now so stuff may run on and the formatting of sentences may suck, but gimmie a break XP

SOOOOOO To start it off in junior-senior year I was on top of the world. Odd way to start off a topic that is going to get very dark and real fast, but I really was. I went to a trade high school meaning one week I would have normal academics with History, AP Physics, AP Calc, English, and all that good stuff and then the next week I would have shop. For some shop was things like metal fabrication, carpentry, cullinary, medical, and whatnot, but as a HUUUUUGE nerd my shop was Engineering. I was super fortunate to be in high school the year I was because my class was the last that was able to work in a NASA project called HUNCH (High school students United with Nasa to Create Hardware) where I was an official (unpaid) NASA employee working on finding a solution to mix materials in 0 gravity ( link to a powerpoint on this thing later, but it wouldnt make sense to put it here ). I was able to use the mixer I designed for more than NASA stuff which lead me to a 3D modeling competition with Stratasys (#1 3D printer company in the world) where I won 2nd in both the state and country for this design (#1 both times was another HUNCH design from my school). This netted me some nice cash prizes and the ability to call it an "award winning design". Then from there I took the design to another competition called SkillsUSA Championships, the largest student run organization in the world, with 2 of my friends. Here we won a gold rank at the state level and a silver at national level which was pretty fkn awesome if I do say so myself. During this time I also netted the girl of my dreams (not giving even her first name because of things that happen later). She was a total nerd like me so we spent time cuddling and playing videogames (try this if you ever can because its just the best), watching nerdy movies, and talking about anything at all. She was really a person I would spend my entire life with, and I was able to take her with me on this journey of success I was on.


NEXT comes senior year. NASA had to defund the HUNCH program (RIP v.v), so that cool mixer thing was obsolete, but in senor year every student has to make a product that has to do with their shop, write a 20 page research paper on a subject about it, and present this in front of the faculty and multiple representatives from the field of study so its kind of a big thing xD. I being the lazy asshole I am just use the HUNCH thing, but completely remodel it and redesign it for this presentation ( https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1lm9-r0eVCDjdpvjLoKBdkq9IWmdEO-OPOfbstttwLQk/edit ). Boom get the highest presentation score in the whole shop just like that. Now is about the time when one day I was at the GF's house and she needed to do something so I was just left alone with her dad (He was a bomb ass free mason dude) and he just looked at me and said "I hope you realize how much she really loves you, and I hope to god you are planning on marrying her in the next few years". I was so used to stories of dads hating boyfriends and whatnot that this really hit me, and man did it make me happy. Now back to school stuff, some kid in my grade did'nt have time to work on a new competition for SkillsUSA so I took his place and man was tht a good choice. The new competition was Additive Manufacturing (3d printing) and for this we had to 3D model a vehicle that had to fit in a certain box, had at least 2 moving parts directly out of the printer (literally as soon as the the support material melted off it had to work which is harder than it sounds), had a strict amount of 3D printer plastic and print time to use, and I had only 1/3 the time to do it as the rest of the kids designing these because I got in late. BUUUUUT I LOOOOOOOVE 3D modeling and printing, so me and a cool dude named Tyler made a camero with working wheels, hood, and steering wheel. We took this to the state portion of SkillsUSA and crushed everyone else, but we weren't satisfied with the model so for the national level we completely scrapped the camero and made a flatbed truck with working wheels, shocks, steeing wheel, hood, and back hatch. This along with a phone case we had to design there in less than an hour (some people at Stratasys loved it so much they printed out personal ones and use it to this day) crushed the rest of the competition and nabbed us a national gold metal. This was the first time anyone from my shop has made it to nationals twice let alone won two medals, so I now have a plaque in my school for it :P . The same night I got news I won my gf called me to tell made it in to the #1 college on her list WITH a scholarship (For background here she was barely passing some classes and didn't even think she would be able to make it in to her last choice) so life was FUUUCKING GREAT. After all this my awards nd shiz nailed me a dream job as an Engineer at an architectural woodworking place where I still work today right out of highschool.


NOOOOOOW the fun part. My job was going amazing, making a good wage at a place I liked working. GF and I were still talking and hanging out whenever she was back home. Thheeeeen the firsh shell hit.. BLAM apparantly my gf hasn't felt love towards me for months and never even gave me a hint about this. Previously we told eachother everything, good or bad, and it formed a bond of trust I have never had with anyone else. This was just shattered in one day when I find out she has been hiding this from me for months on end and she just wanted to end the relationship cold turkey without trying to fix it at all. We decide to take a month or two off to see how things go and this is when I break down... HARD. At a young age I was bullied to attempting suicide, but got myself together and never looked back, but now the passive suicidal thoughts were coming back which surged me in to a panic attack at work. I ran back to her and we decided to have a long deep talk about how we stood the next weekend and that calmed me down knowing that things werent over yet. We went and saw deadpool on premier night (AWESOME MOVIE) then the next morning talked for hours on end about how we really felt and we were closer than we ever were after that... or so I thought. Aparantly as i was spilling my heart out in every bit to her she was just lying to me to make me feel better the entire time, and broke up with me the day before my february vacation so I took that HARD. When she broke up with me she gave me very little closure on why and that was probably the worst part of it. Around this time I get pulled over for an inspection sticker that was out of date (didn't even notice.. RIP) and aparantly when i swapped insurance companies the old one got the new one caught up in red tape, so the RMV thought I was both uninsured and my vehicle was unregistered. THIS made the cops take away my car and plates so I was issued a court date and had to pay almost $400 to just get my car back so I could go to work the next day. Turns out there was a lot wrong with my car so I had to dump (and still am dumping) all of my money from work in to fixing this car. Great thing to happen when im already down on life. A month go by and i ask to talk to her in person to get down to why she really broke up with me. Here she told me how she was going through a gender/sexual identity crisis and was uncomfortable being with someone while she wasnt sure herself what was going on. She said she had realized she was A-gendered (google it and you will get better answers that I can) and still wasnt sure about her sexuality yet and didnt want to be with anyone. I asked her specifically about some dude that she introduced me to while we were together and hung out with occasionally (previously I told her it was okay if she wanted to hook up with him because I honestly dont believe in monogamy and was totally fine with her seeing others in college and keeping an open relationship) and she said that nothing was going on between them. Come to a few weeks ago and there was a miss-print on the original court document I got, so I went to court two days late and now have to go in front of the judge instead of the magistrate next month... thank you world. This comes to today where I find out at work that the GF was lying and is now with the guy she specifically said nothing was happening with only 3 months after we got out of our 2.5year relationship. NIIIIICEEEEEEEE that sent me in to a panic attack today again at work so I drove home and the best friends int he whole world (Nancy/Ooffee and Wes/MMM) helped me calm down and all that stuff. As soon as I got home I found out that my license may get suspended and my golly has it been a great day :D

SO this is generally what my life has been in the past few years and as soon as everything is finally cleared up I hope I can get on to fwig more, but for right now my god 50hr work weeks suck (but pay very well) and I am an emotional mess so my time on FWG will be limited and sparse.

Please don't pitty me because god there are a ton of people with worse situations than me and I can get back up... This was basically a warning to all of those who feel on the top of the world that everything can come crashing down at a moment's notice so keep an eye out and don't rely on anything that isn't set in stone to keep you up, because it may very well come crashing down and take you with it.
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Lamb
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Re: My absense (Too real for general chat)

Postby Lamb » 23 Jun 2016, 18:24

Sucks. Know feel, maybe not to the extent of falling off of cloud 9 like that, but I know how it feels for shit to go from great to absolute bottomless.
The life of an adult sucks, but we'll all get through it together, one day at a time.
I've lost my pieces.

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Re: My absense (Too real for general chat)

Postby Dr Frook » 25 Jun 2016, 23:56

dudeeee
The BUGBLATTER BEAST HAS SPOKEN, ALL HAIL THE BLATTERER!
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J3rdegree
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Re: My absense (Too real for general chat)

Postby J3rdegree » 26 Jun 2016, 17:42

UPDATE: Today i found out due to a mixup at the RMV they never gave me notice that I needed to take a course to not get my license suspended. sooooo as of July 7th my license will be revoked for 90 days :D

Life loves me rn lol
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